Home > Resistance > Call Reluctance, Fear of Rejection, Lack of Confidence, and All That Stuff

Call Reluctance, Fear of Rejection, Lack of Confidence, and All That Stuff

"Call reluctance" is a term that pops up once in a while, perhaps not as often as "fear of rejection."

How are they related, and how do they stack up to your self esteem, your personal confidence? Where are these things in your psyche. Are they illusionary. Are they grounded in reality?

Thoughts? - by Gary A Boye
I always advise in that situation . . . .

Hey . . . I've just had a great idea. Why don't we pretend...that we are REALLY helping the potential customer . . . that way we don't need to feel any fear (the shrouded irony is deliberate of course)

When new salespeople start to understand that 'if we are NOT helping them then what the h*ll ARE we doing' . . .things will get a lot easier.


. - by helisell
I believe that the fear of rejection comes from personal insecurity and low self-esteem. It's the opposite of self-confidence and success. And unfortunately, it is a self-fulfilling prophecy and Rx for failure in sales.

In stating this, I'm not suggesting that salespeople be arrogant or overly-confident either - that's the ultimate turn-off in my opinion! But embracing fear, taking risks and accepting rejection are empowering and liberating...the necessary ingredients to overcome call reluctance and knock on any door - in sales and in life!! :)

Coach Maria - by CoachMaria
"Call reluctance" is a term that pops up once in a while, perhaps not as often as "fear of rejection."

How are they related, and how do they stack up to your self esteem, your personal confidence? Where are these things in your psyche. Are they illusionary. Are they grounded in reality?

Thoughts?
From our research: call reluctance, the fear of rejection, and the lack of confidence, are rooted in our natural sense of guilt and shame.

When you are acting outside of your sense of self, that ignites guilt. When you are being someone outside your sense of self, that is shame. In both cases there is a feeling of personal lack or unworthiness. This feeling compels you to avoid those situations in the future to retain self-esteem.

Rejection occurs when someone triggers this feeling of guilt or shame in us. Through non-acceptance of what we are representing as an extension of our identity, they remind us that what we are selling does not conform to who we are--that we are being and doing outside of our true sense of self.

If someone prides themselves as being wise, then he or she will avoid looking stupid at all costs. You might think that no one wants to look stupid but many do not gage their self-worth on what they know. When caught looking less than intelligent they simply laugh it off.

When selling something that does not conform to who they are that "no" tells the sales rep they are behaving in contradiction to their inner identity (stupid) and there is psychological imbalance and withdrawal.

Rejection, shame and guilt, are just natural triggers that keep our sense of self consistent over time. They act as barriers keeping us from drifting too far away from behaving according to our inner motivation and purpose in life as seen through our identity.

While grounded in illusion, they are the reality we have created for ourselves and without them we would be schizophrenic. - by John Voris
All of the above and other things. I don't have any of that anymore I just don't like doing it - the repetition of anything all my life has been a bummer to me - it drives me nuts. I don't know if I would have been any good in any kind of sales situation requiring 3 - 4 hours of calling a day.

Even in what I do which is network marketing with one company for the past 14 years - which includes direct sales - I'm one of the successful ones but I'm not as strong on the calling end as I should be - so I work in other ways to maximize my talents and best abilities.

When I had fear or reluctance it was mostly insecurity.

Mike - by MitchM
I almost gave up sales completly because of fear and rejection. It got so bad I kept track of how many times I got rejected just so I could feel I was making some type of progress. I tallied up the number of rejections I got on the back of a business card. When I would come back to the office my boss would see all these tick marks on the back of my card. He asked me what are all those tick marks for. I told him that's how many "Nos" I got for the day. Everyone else laughed but my boss said "You know, that's not a bad idea"

Soon I found out the more rejection I took the more sales I made. Sometimes fear and rejection can work in your favor if you play a game with it. - by Cedric
Weekly Updates!
Questions and Answers about Selling
Subscribe to our mailing list to get threads and posts sent to your email address weekly - Free of Charge.