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Script Help Please!

Just came from this thread - http://www.salespractice.com/forums/t-10843.html - where excellent advice was given, and hoping to benefit from the support of this community.

Here's what I have now, and I'm going to re-work it this minute based on what I read in the above thread.

Your help is VERY MUCH appreciated!!

Hi [NAME], this is Joshua with Reliable Receptionist in WALNUT CREEK. We are a high-tech REMOTE RECEPTIONIST service.

We sent you a postcard recently, have you seen it?

I’m just calling to see if you’ve ever lost an opportunity because a client call went to voicemail?

We make sure every call is answered live and professionally, so you can concentrate on the task at hand. We actually work with a lot of [BUSINESS TYPE] here in the East Bay, and have helped them increase profits by scheduling appointments with callers that usually hang up on voicemail.

Who usually answers the phone now?

Please give us a call at 925.627.4200, or check out our website at RELIABLERECEPTIONIST.COM.

Thanks!
- by Phateless
IF you