Sharon Drew Morgen - Buying Facilitation

I wanted to start a thread where members can ask Sharon Drew questions about "Buying Facilitation". If anyone has a question or questions feel free to post them in this thread.

I'll start.

Sharon Drew, many salespeople are happy with the skills they are using. Why would they want to change if they think they are working for them? -Jeff Blackwell

How necessary, or unnecessary, is buying facilitation if you're working with someone who is ready, willing, and able to buy? -Gilbert

two questions to be answered. i'll take gilbert's first.

the only people who are totally ready, willing, and able to buy are people buying toothpaste, or something simple that doesn't demand any input from internal criteria.

the question to ask yourself is: is it working? the way you'll know is if they call you, place and order, and it's all done in one call. once you need to follow up, or they need to call back, or you need to do ANYTHING other than take an order, they need some sort of help being let through their decision process.

just because people recognize and understand their Identified Problem doesn't mean they know how to resolve it - or they would have already! once people exhibit a need, it means they haven't decided to resolve it yet. either they can't, or they don't know how. so knowing the problem, knowing the solution, having the money, being ready and willing, doesn't mean they'll buy. unless in your case they do. then you certainly don't need Buying Facilitation.

that sort of answers jeff's question as well: sellers think that protracted sales cycles, and closing 10% or less is normal. and indeed it's the norm for the sales model and the entire field has adjusted to it.

remember: the time it takes buyers to come up with their OWN ANSWERS (which are absolutely hidden from us, and often at first hidden from them as well) is the length of the sales cycle. we've attempted to sell by understanding needs, solving problems, and placing product. but the buyer has an entire series of strange, unique issues they need to manage, and there has never been a way in to manage these issues before now.

i did some work with IBM a few years ago. we did a pilot with folks who had the same clients for 3 years - they were Relationship Managers. they were complaining that they didn't need to learn anything new cuz they knew their clients well and were in constant contact with them. during the training, we had 2 days of real time phone coaching, and i made some calls to their clients and they did as well. using Buying Facilitation, they actually discovered, AND CLOSED, $6,400,000 (that's six point four million dollars) of undiscovered business lying right there, on the table, and they would have lost the business, and the client's would either have not had their needs met at all, or would have used another vendor. -Sharon Drew Morgen

Are buying facilitation questions like spin selling questions? -Thomas

antithetical. two different animals. spin is a way to help place product and questions are directed toward problem solving. my facilitative questions are based on leading buyers through all of their decision criteria based on how the Identified Problem got created and maintained through time, and all of the internal issues (stakeholders, vendor issues, initiative past and future, personality problems, etc) that must be managed before they'll purchase. i have a pdf file that i think jeff just put up that you can print off (3 pages) that lays out the model. it's a decision facilitation tool that is unbiased and uses systems thinking; i've also sequenced the way decisions get made (brain function, etc) and use that to help buyers unravel what needs to happen for them to decide, using their own criteria.

questions like: what has stopped you from making that change until now? and how would you and your decision team know when they would be ready to consider adding a new vendor relationship to the ones you're already using?

it's not about you, or your product. it's about their decision.and my questions position questions to offer support in enlisting the buyer's own criteria for change.

sd -Sharon Drew Morgen

That looks very complicated. :un -Thomas

walking is complicated for a baby. it's just new and different. and we've not been trained to think that way.

i've coded the sequence. and i teach people how to formulate the questions. the hardest thing when i teach is to get folks to listen differently. it's about listening to the SYSTEM behind what is being said rather than the content.

when i hear someone say "we didn't realize this solution would cost so much and we're going to have to wait 'til next year" i hear something different than what sellers hear. they usually start talking about price,thinking that there is a price objection. i hear that there are systems issues too large to be managed (it's almost never about price). so i ask a facilitative question here:
"What would you and your decision team need to be considering between now and then, so when the time is right everything will be ready and in place for you to implement without time wastage?"

once you learn it, like walking, it's not so complicated. just new and different. -Sharon Drew Morgen

Can it really be learned in three days? -Thomas

yes and kinda.

1. i have developed a new modality for training that uses the same brain function sequencing that Buying Facilitation uses, so we're working with your learning centers rather than me doing lectures and info dumps to a brain that is already set up the way it's set up. so we can get pretty far along into the learning process as we open up possibilities and capapbility that didn't exist previously. every single student i've trained has learned. no exceptions. the training is just set up that way. it's a learning model rather than a training model. a bit more uncomfortable than regular training as the learner has much more work to do that it's always pleasant (i.e. you might learn that you don't really listen for what is being said vs what you want to hear, and then we have to move from there....but you might have feelings about what you are 'learning' that you wouldn't have if just taking notes).

2. you'll have to practice for a few weeks afterwards and i haven't figured out how to miss this step. imagine you are learning a new swing from Tiger Woods, or backhand from Chris Everett. you'd have to practice.and i can't make that any easier. but you walk away from the 3 days with about 50% of what you need. some people find that enough. some practice. it's what you want.

3. all that said, i've developed a second program that just teaches the 6 Facilitative Questions that will get you pretty far a lot of the time, and teach you how to understand all of the buyer's buying patterns. this course is much easier, without the learning curve. but you won't have the tools/skills to formulate the questions yourself.

so if you want EASY, take the Facilitating Buying Decisions program.
if you want to learn the entire model, take the Buying Facilitation program.

i happen to be running these next month here in austin. i don't generally run public trainings cuz my work is in organizations, but i'm running a Licensing Partner's program and you could take one of the modules if you don't want to be a licensee.

hope that all helps. -Sharon Drew Morgen

Are the two systems compatible? -Houston

well, i'll tell you.

it's always necessary to present your product appropriately, and to gather appropriate data to ensure that what you have is what they need.

and, Buying Facilitation manages the buyer's decision. so both are necessary.

but here's what happens: once the buyer knows how to decide, the type, style, and amount of presentation or pitch data changes. when i worked with KPMG they went from a $350,000 presentation to a $35,000 presentation. lots of information may be necessary when you don't know (and they don't know) how the buyer is buying and you're seeking to get them all of the data necessary for them to choose what's most relevant. but with Buying Facilitation, the exact amount/type/style of data will be specified, and then you only need to offer exactly what they need.

so your presentation and pitch will change - and you'll even need to add new material you're not used to offering in order to help their stakeholders manage the change that will come with placing your product within their sytsem.

to make it simple: if you're selling plates, and there ends up being only so much room in the buyer's cabinet and they don't want to get rid of what they have, you'll only pitch data on the size plate that would fit - not general data. simple, but visual.

in general, my clients find they need far less data, almost never send anything out in the mail, do far fewer presentations, and do far fewer field visits. and close 3x as many sales.

we're used to pitching/positioning/presenting OUR information, and not knowing the buyer's buying criteria. once THEY know their own criteria, you only need to give them the data that matches.

remember: information doesn't teach someone how to make a decision.
sd -Sharon Drew Morgen

Excellent point.

Let's say I'm selling new cars at a Chevy dealership and a prospect drive on the lot, get's out and starts looking at cars. If I was trainined in Facilitative Buying what would I do different than traditional sales training methods? -Houston

can't go through an entire sale here; but it's about the decision. how did he choose his last car? how would it be different/the same? what would stop him from using his current car dealership/vendor to make another purchase? how would he know that one car over another would handle his criteria? how would his wife and family need to be a part of the decision and how would he help them collaborate so they could make a decision that would include all of their criteria?

nothing to do with the car. you've seen it a hundreds times: buyer with a need that doesn't purchase anything, or in a timely way, or anything sane. it's never about the product. it's always about the system that the decision needs to manage.

we just didn't know how to do this before now.
sd -Sharon Drew Morgen

Fair enough. ;co I'm just trying to get an idea on how this would work in a familiar selling environment.

From what I've gathered it's about the decision to buy or not to buy. Once the decision is made they are or are not "willing". Is that accurate?

These questions seem the same but different. It looks like your attempting to elicit a buying criteria but the intent is different. Is that accurate? -Houston

this is not exactly about the decision to buy. it's about the decisions necessary for the internal elements to agree to change. so it's about a decision to change; the decision to be willing to do something different (how would you know when it was time to change your hairstyle? is not a decision about using one hairstylist over another, but about the decision to change the way you look) and allow a change to happen in a closed system (how would you know when it was time to shift the way you've been doing sales until now? not a question about Buying Facilitation but a question about your willingness/ability to want to do something different).

once they have all of their internal decision criteria managed, then they need to decide what and how and when to buy.

and, if you are not willing to change your hairstyle, doesn't matter what a great hairdresser i am.... although i might push a bit further and say: 'i'm a noted stylist. i see you looking differently than the way you look now [this is your pitch]. i'm wondering what you would need to believe differently to be willing to reconsider your current choices about your hairstyle?' if the person said 'nothing' you're done.

if you're happy with your sales results and have no desire to change, then i doesn't matter how great Buying Facilitation is. at the top of the Funnel (see my ebook at www.buyingfacilitation.com for the latest funnel) is Where are we and what's missing. if nothing is missing, there is nothing to change. doesn't matter what the product is, doesn't matter what the seller believes.

but facilitative questions can make it possible to expand viewpoints using the buyer's own criteria.

and, again, careful here. I AM NOT TRYING TO ELICIT BUYING CRITERIA. i'm teaching the buyer how to elicit THEIR OWN buying criteria. doesn't matter if i know it or not. THEY need to know it, own it, and have all stakeholders buy-in to it and an outsideir cannot do that.

ok?? really different from sales. and yet the buyer must to it before they buy. with you or without you. and the seller is an outsider. so the buyer does it alone. or has done it alone untill now.Buying Facilitation will give you the tools to lead them through it using their own criteria, and coming up with their own answers. BF is biased only toward expanding the buyer's own unique criteria NOT selling a product.


-Sharon Drew Morgen

Sharon Drew why do you think salespeople haven't been taught this before? -Jeff Blackwell

good question. i even think i have an answer!

at this point in history, we have a very complex business environment - global/unknown competitors; business partners in different companies and areas of expertise; vendor possibilities; quick, easy ways for our competition to catch up and look just like us and make it difficult to differentiate.

before now, we've been able to use the 'information exchange' method to sell with: what is your problem? what do you need? here's what i have to help fix it.

but buyers have much, much bigger, more complex decisions to make now. and the Identified Problem is only a tip of the iceberg in re the decisions that must be made before they can consider a solution.

and, there has been no model that actually gets INSIDE the decision making to help stakeholders.

one of the good things about this sequencing model is that it is unbiased, whereas sales tends to be biased toward an ultimate goal of product placement. the ultimate goal of Buying Facilitation is to help evoke a collaborative decision that actually teaches buyers to seek, find, and makes sense of all of the internal decisions that got them where they are. so when you ask: what has stopped you and your decision team from resolving this until now? it's not an information gathering question but a way for the buyer to gather internal, possibly hidden data in his/her brain that needs to be brought to light to add to the decision making needs for future choices. it's a question we ask about 1/3 down the funnel to direct the brain to older decisions.

another question might be: how would you and your decision team know how to choose one vendor over another when our products are so similar? they have to answer these questions for themselves anyway, and doing it WITH you puts them on your team.

so, i think the answer to the question is twofold: 1. it wasn't perceived as 'time' before now (although i've been training this material for almost 20 years); and 2. no one has designed a model such as this. and, to be honest, only a few visionaries have had the foresight to bring this in to their companies. even now not everyone thinks it's time for this.

hope this answered your question, jeff.
sd -Sharon Drew Morgen

That does answer my question Sharon Drew. Thank you for being such a good sport.

If you don't mind me asking, You claim you can get a 200-600% increase in sales. That is a big claim how does that happen? -Jeff Blackwell

1. kpmg had an 8 figure international deal that took 3 years to close. using BF they closed in 4 months. ibm had a 6 mo. sale with a software product. we closed in 2 calls. kaiser: from 110 face visits and 18 closed sales a month to 27 visits and 25 closed sales.

the time it takes buyers to come up with their own answers is the length of the sales cycle. they have to come up with their own answers anyway - with you or without you. so when you lead them in an unbiased way through to their own best answers,it cuts the sale dramatically.

buyers don't care how long it takes or they would have solved the problem already. they just need to get it right without causing internal stress/disruption. so they are happy to do it quicker.

2. no more time wastage; only visit prospects who want to close and they will have their entire decision team there at the meeting; get rid of tirekickers and wasted time following around prospects who will never close; use the phone more proactively and don't use your body as a prospecting tool; find more prospects than are obvious - those who didn't know they need your product but through your questions realize they do.

clearer? -Sharon Drew Morgen

Does your program show how to find more prospects too?

Something else. I have read some of your articles and you talked about rapport. Some salespeople think you should talk about pictures on the prospects walls, and trophies, you know small talk, to build common ground or rapport. What do you think? -Thomas

sorry, but that's b.s.

if you want to try to make nice, have fun. you and everyone else.

if you want to start off immediately helping your buyer make sense of how they will decide to be the best they can be by using their own criteria, it's a different conversation.

i train this stuff, and if you want to learn it, i'm running a rare public program that is part of a partner licensing program. i can't teach the material on the fly like this - hopefully you'll get to understand it a bit and i sure hope that helps.

but if you want to learn how to do it, it needs a program.

remember: there are two sides to the equation: the buying decision side and the selling side. you're still talking about the selling side - not asking questions about the buying side. pictures on their walls? they know what pictures they have already.
sd -Sharon Drew Morgen

The beauty of Sharon Drew's book is you learn the process by practicing it on yourself, first -- you become your own "buyer" in reframing your sales process. That said, there is a difference between learning Buying Facilitation(which really is easy, because it makes such transparent good sense compared to chasing customers around the wheel like a hampster) and developing the confidence to actually use it with customers when success, money and ego (not to mention one's job) are on the line.

I like what Goleman suggests about Emotionally Intelligent Learning -- we're really "re-wiring our beliefs of what's possible for us to do." I started doing this years ago with sales clients and then found a very solid description of why it works described as "stealth learning" in Goleman's Primal Leadership, (pages 158-160 - the whole Chapter 8 Metamorphosis is worth reading). In essense, you combine mental rehearsal with low-threat/low risk practice situations (not with customers) where you can botch a technique without penalty. For example, in a conversation with a friend contemplating a decision, practice using the facilitative questions she focuses on until they feel "right." -tom behr

I am relieved that you think that way. I do too. thmbp2; -Thomas

it's about helping the buyer make a decision. sellers have used product data to try to do that, and all that does is keep the buyer confused, by their stakeholders, business issues, and how to solve their business problem.

buyers don't want your product. they want to solve a business problem. your product may or may not do that. but you can do that. help them do that. the product will be purchased as part of the process.

would you rather sell? or have someone buy? -Sharon Drew Morgen

One more question if you don't mind Sharon Drew. On paper this could be seen as an interviewing process. Is that what we’re doing here? -Jeff Blackwell

well... yup. seems to be.

what's so amazing for me is the gentleness with which people are asking their questions. so many sales folks become hostile to the thought that what they are doing might not be working as well as it might - they take it personally, although as we know, the field of sales hasn't known how to enter the buyer's space as Buying Facilitation does until now and it certainly isn't the fault of hard-working professional sales folks.

i find myself learning from these gentle queries - learning what actually might be curious, or uncomfortable for folks, or truly something quizzical.

maybe we're interviewing each other (although goodness knows i'm talking so much that saying that is probably strange!)...

so, thanks, everyone. hope you're having as much fun, and learning as much, as i am.
sd -Sharon Drew Morgen

How does your program differ from that of other NLP Gurus who teach NLP in the sales profession such as Kenrick Clevland and Kevin Hogan? -Jorel

i've been in the nlp environment since the early 80s. in fact, my books are still sold at nlp conventions, as i use nlp as the basic foundational thinking of my model.

but the above gurus are using nlp to help with rapport, etc, based on the seller/outsider trying to persuade the buyer/insider to do what the seller wants.

another foundation of my thinking is buddhist in nature: that we are all one, all part of the same system, and must all serve each other. nlp (a la grinder and bandler who are not usually considered spiritual people... trust me on this one) is based on how to replicate excellence, not about the system of how decisions get made. i say this as a master prac, as well as having had an entire third year 'Beyond' program with a small group led by Gene Early (who is a very spiritual person, i might add). in re the buddhist ideas, Buying Facilitation is based on the seller actually serving the buyer to support the buyer in being all s/he can be, using his/her own internal criteria.

the final foundation of my work is systems thinking. sellers don't think that way. here is a quote from one of my books:
"Make no mistake: this resolution of systems components needs to happen anyway - with you or without you - and the time it takes buyers to accomplish this is the length of the sales cycle."

the questioning system, the sequence of decision making, are all created around the idea that until someone/a group knows how to make a decision that will account for all variables so that when change happens there will be no disruption (you've heard of the term 'homeostasis'?), nothing will happen.

so nlp thinking is a small part of what i'm doing here, but certainly not the main part. the systems bit is i think...
sd
-Sharon Drew Morgen

It does read like the buying facilitation process is an add-on to the interview step. You help the client make the decision to buy and the decision of which product to buy.

Last month I bought your book "Sales on the Line". Is telemarketing part of the training in May? -fred

hi fred:

2 things - last thing first as it's easier. Sales on the Line was written 15 years ago. you might want to consider my newest ebook called Buying Facilitation: the new way to sell that influences and expands thinking. you can get it at: www.buyingfacilitation.com
it breaks down the entire decisioning sequence, introduces Facilitative Questions, etc.
and, i have a very very strong bias toward the phone. sellers can use the phone to do almost everything, as it's not about the 'relationship' so much as it is about the buyer making decisions. and since those are unique, and happen within the buyer's environment, the seller doesn't have to be there, and the very model itself creates such strong rapport that face visits aren't necessary.
in all of my years of selling training in the BF method, i have only met one client first - and that was cuz they lived right here in austin. i've signed mid-six figure contracts and have never met the client. so, yes, all of my work centers around using Facilitative Questions, with the phone as the bias.
note that Sales on the Line, while a lovely little book, was written far before i understood what i was really doing.

next: Buying Facilitation is not an interview process. it would be as if the seller were a robot, asking a specific type of question to help the other person determine how to move forward, define their own needs, and figure out how to make the decisions to involve the necessary people, change the necessary policies and vendor relationships, and handle the politics - all that have created and maintain the status quo.

of course the seller isn't a robot but the seller needs wholly different skills for this activity than needs analysis/product placement. you must learn to listen for the system that thebuyer is speaking in, and not about the content. that takes the full 3 days of the program in fact.

when i hear 'my partners aren't ready right now to make a decision,' for example, it might mean: i am happy but can't get those bums to move, or i am unhappy and blaming others, or we have a huge initiative going on and we can't take our eye off of the ball, or there is a political/personal conflict going on, etc. and we have no way of knowing , but it's obviously stopping the decision process. the FQ i would ask here is: 'what would you and your decision partners need to be doing differently to be ready to align behind a solution?'

that question would get the buyer to start dealing with whatever the internal problem is (which i do NOT need to know as i'm not one of them and i cannot resolve the problem even if i knew the answer) and on the spot start making the decisions to start actions to heal the issue. remember that these questions are not asked on their own, but part of a sequence (too complicated to teach/explain outside of the classroom but the new ebook has a chapter on it) that leads the buyer very comfortably through all of the decisions that are separate from fixing their problem.

so, not an interview process per se, but certainly sits on the front end of sales and supports what needs to happen anyway before a buying decision gets made.

ok?? come to the program. there are going to be less than 10 people there and you'll get a lot of support in using the phone, formulating the questions, listening/understanding all that is going on for the buyer that needs to be managed.

sd -Sharon Drew Morgen

Couldn't you also ask a clarifying question (("What does that mean?")) and get the same result? -Marcus

Remember that at the top of the the Funnel - the Buying Decision Funnel - NOT the Product Decision Funnel - you are NOT gathering data.

when you ask 'what does that mean?" you are asking for clarification. you absolutely need clarification on the product placement/problem solving/needs analysis end.

at the Buying Decision end, you need NO clarification at all , as there is nothing you need to know. THEY need to know.

go back and look at my FAcilitative Question, and imagine having a mess in your group/company, and see what that question does for your brain in re discovering it's own criteria and what needs to shift.

when you ask an information-pull question like you suggested, you are asking for info on a decision already made. this is VERY important to understand.

Facilitative Questions do NOT pull data: they direct the brain to seek criteria, choices, changes, etc. in those areas that would be responsible for managing change. that's why my programs are so small: teaching people to NOT have information=based, content-based curiousity but to think in systems thinking terms about how decisions get made.

go to my site and have a look around.and somewhere on the site here jeff has put up a pdf file on concepts, etc. of Buying Facilitation. again, when you're asking the question you're asking, you're still gathering data and doing problem solving. i'm suggesting an entirely new skill set is necessary.

thanks for the question.

sd -Sharon Drew Morgen

Sharon Drew Morgen is one of the most advanced thinkers and strategists in the field of selling.

If you are ready to act rather than contemplate; if you are ready to take a giant step in your career, instead of baby steps, learn from her. -JacquesWerth

In the interview step what is the desired outcome of using facilitative questions? Is it to have the customer reevaluate their thinking? -Houston

Can you plz let me know what you mean by 'interview step'?
Who is interviewing who? and for what reason?

All of Buying Facilitation (and remember, it is used before conventional sales models are used) is about helping the buyer make the necessary internal decisions to figure out how to align and manage the people/rules/roles/politics/history that got them where they are now and that might potentially need an additional resource.

Since Facilitative Questions are posed to help the brain expand possibilities, they never 'interview'. They are actually a decision support tool. So it's the different between: Who are your vendors now? and How will you and your decision team know when it's time to add a new vendor to the resources you are currently using?

So it's not to reevaluate their thinking but to help them align all of the elements that would need to go in to the decision to do something new/different. Remember that everything within their current system (the people, rules, relationships, politics, etc.) conspire to maintain their status quo and will continue to do so until something changes. We can't know what that 'something' is as we are outsiders. But we can sure help them figure it out much more quickly than they would doing it on their own.

They have to figure stuff out before they buy your product or face internal disruption if all of the necessary 'powers that be' aren't on board. They can do this with you or without you. Facilitative Questions are tools that bring the decision elements together. So in the above question in re vendors, it brings together the decision team, the new necessary choices, the criteria that will need to be developed or decided upon, the juxtaposition of a new vendor vs an established/known/loved vendor.

Normal questions seek data on decisions already made. They don't move the client forward in their decision, just extract data for the use of the seller. Facilitative Questions teach clients how to make their best decisions.

Hope this helps. It's a different concept, I know... but it works.
sd -Sharon Drew Morgen

Prior to presenting a solution I sit down with customers and ask them questions to get an idea of what it is they want and how to help them get it. That is the interview step for me.


This is close to what I was thinking. If you ask for the answer then that's all you get but if you ask a question that gets them to rethink or reformulate the answer you might do better. -Houston

Very close, Houston. Even more amazing, the Facilitative Questions actually teach them to THINK THROUGH all of the issues they may not have been aware of.

Conventional questions just pull data from a decision already made.

Facilitative Questions teach them how to organize all of the 'bits' that need to go into their next decision.

cool, right?! but it's necessary to take care and have no bias. That's why I developed the sequence to how decisions actually get made.

You might want to get my book Buying Facilitation: the new way to sell. It's explained there... the sequence is based on how their brain thinks and the route the brain takes to make new decisions.

sd -Sharon Drew Morgen

Are the facilitative questions created on the fly or do you have a model for creating the questions or are the questions pretty much predetermined? -Houston

Hi again, Houston (and, since I live in Dallas, it's fun addressing you as Houston..):

Since I never know how someone will respond, or where they need to make their next decision (and every Facilitative Question leads to some sort of decision as the brain goes from one decision point to the next on the way toward a final decision), it's impossible to make scripts. Not only that, the FQs are interspersed with Presumptive Summaries and Agreements....

The FQs are part of my entire Buying Facilitation Method process.
I teach people how to formulate them in a classroom and coaching. That's what I do for a living.

Once folks learn how to listen through a Systems filter rather than a Content filter, they are easier to formulate but still need practice. And OH, do i wish it were easy. But think of it as learning to play tennis, or learning a new language. Just takes a few weeks of practice and then you've got it.... Difficult mainly cuz we've never been taught to think that way.

So - yes, on the fly, they follow the sequence of decision making, and never scripted, and can be learned.

The book Buying Facilitation will get you to understanding how to listen, the explaining the system behind them, and that's a good start. Won't get you all the way there (i cannot get you there without coaching/training any more than you could learn a new language totally on your own) but it will make a good start.

Good luck, Houston. Let me know if i can help you learn.
sd -Sharon Drew Morgen

I watched your video yesterday...

...and in that video you said that information doesn't help people make decisions. My question is have you used facilitative questions in advertising before and if you have was there a noticeable difference in response rates? -SpeedRacer

Hi Speedracer:

I use FQs with everything I do. One of my dreams is that marketing will begin using them to design interactive ads rather than one-dimensional ones. Imagine instead of a beautiful ad for a very expensive car, there is also the question: How would you know it was time to buy a luxury car?

The nature of the question itself makes the ad interactive and memorable, plus will connect with far more people than a visual.

Do you want to try it? Are you creating an ad campaign and want to design some FQs for it?

The problem I"ve had is that so few folks (relatively) understand what these questions do that they can't get their brain around them (literally). For me it's so simple.. and so vital.

sd -Sharon Drew Morgen

It reads like the idea is to get people thinking along certain lines and asking questions like the one you posted will do that to a degree. I can see where follow-up questions would be important. Almost like deepening a trance. You're not a hypnotist are you? ;st -SpeedRacer

ahahaha...
Nope. Not a hypnotist!

What I am actually doing is leading the other person's brain through the steps that their brain must take naturally anyway in order to make their next decision. Problem is most folks do it slowly because it's an unconscious process and the time it takes them to do it is the length of the sales cycle.

I'm just helping them go through the process consciously and without bias (there is NO manipulation or bias around selling my product other than the positioning of the questions. so i could ask How are you currently going about choosing new content to add to the current sales training you are offering your employees? That question doesn't bias the answer toward my product, but teaches where in the brain to look for its own answer).

It does take a bit of practice to learn how to listen for where the question needs to be placed and then how to choose the right words to use to get to that decision making place. Doable,just takes a bit of practice. and very very powerful stuff.

sd -Sharon Drew Morgen

Sharon, great lover of your work - Welcome.

And what is your opinion on NLP? -Snowboy

Hi Snowboy:
For some reason, there seems to be a mixup on my responses.

It seems to me that my printed response in re your question about NLP was not a direct response and it seems like a non-sequiter.
so let me reply here properly:

I think NLP is amazing - one of the most imortant communication tools of the 20th century. But I also believe it has been misrepresented as a manipulation tool, rather than a communication tool.

I studied NLP for 3 full years - I have every diploma available plus one, and have studied with the greats and founders. The material breaks down the systems of how excellence happens - the subjective experience of excellence - and teaches learners how to attain choice. From what I learned over the years, I developed a Choice Model, and the basis of my questioning/decision making sequence was one aspect of NLP that I took to a new and different level.

Used with integrity and the belief that we are all here to serve each other, NLP is brilliant. Used as a manipulation, it becomes an evil genius.

Your decision as to how to use it. Hope this is clearer than the answer that appears under your question (and I am not sure how that answer ended up under your question and will contact Jeff to find out.)...
hope this helps..
sharon drew -Sharon Drew Morgen

I agree with Sharon Drew - I usually do.

NLP can facilitate clear and open communications very effectively - unless it is used to gain an unfair advantage.

NLP can also clarify your own thinking - to get straight with yourself.

Unfortunately, most of the people who are teaching NLP to salespeople are advocating its use as a manipulation tool. Used for that purpose, it is counterproductive. It will lose as many sales as it gains. When used to manipulate a prospect, the resultant long-term relationship is seldom a good one. -JacquesWerth

Hi Jaques:
Nice to 'meet up with you' again, as it were.

One of the unfortunate labels that both salesfolks and nlp folks have is that of manipulation. Since sales has focused on product sale, rather than buyer's decisions, selling has a history of using every form of 'tool' available, and sometimes that has become manipulative.

It's a shame, because I believe that most sales people (like most folks using nlp) truly care about others and want to facilitate folks in truly making their best decisions. Funny how things get a bad rep and get reduced to their lowest common denominators, rather than rise to ethical, values-based stances.

But, between us, Jacques, I suspect we're giving the world a different experience of what's possible.

sd -Sharon Drew Morgen

Sharon Drew, I apologize - because it is only recently that I have come to realize that Buying Facilitation really is compatible with High Probability Selling.

Sharon Drew Morgen is truly one of the most advanced thinkers in the sales training and sales consulting industry. (Feel free to use that quote).

Peace and joy,
Jacques -JacquesWerth

In this forum I see many references to the word, "manipulative"....and I'm a bit confused by all the rhetoric taking place about whether it is or it isn't.

I've been in the sales field for over 40 years and while I consider myself successful I don't consider myself manipulative by any stretch of the imagination.

I should first say that I have not a clue what NLP means.

I have learned through trial and error that how I say something or phrase a question can make a tremendous difference in the kind of response I get.

For example: If I'm making a cold call on the telephone, or in person the first question after I've introduced myself is: Besides yourself, who else in your company buys the product/service I sell?

Is that kind of phrasing considered manipulative?

Thanks,

Chuck -Sales Pro 1000

Hi Chuck:
That is not a manipulate question, but it doesn't help them make a decision. It gives YOU data, but doesn't help their decision making when they give you data that they already know.

Buying Facilitation helps the buyer align, recognize, and manage all of those internal, hidden, unconscious decisions they need to know the answers to before they'll decide to buy anything. It's not about the sale or the product or the seller finding out stuff; it's about the buyer's decision criteria.

You might want to go back to the LONG thread here that answers so many questions about Buying Facilitation. Hope it helps...

And, Jacques: I hate to say 'I told you so' but as Maude (Bea Arthur... and, yes, i'm absolutely 'dating' myself 'way back) once said to her hapless husband, "buy you heard it here first.'

i'll call you next week... talk soon.
sd -Sharon Drew Morgen

Sharon,
Chuck,
Jacques,
Thanks for the response in this regardthmbp2; -Snowboy

Sharon,
Just a quick note to say really love the buying facilitation.

Good work thmbp2; -Jabber

Sharon,

Thanks for the reply. Reading the thread as we speak. Some superb information you're sharing.

Chuck -Sales Pro 1000

Excellent marketing Sharon. Your system sounds very unique, innovative, and valuable and I hope the people on this forum take advantage of this new approach and add it to their 'toolbox.'

Great work... -Dougd55

Hi Jabber, Snowboy, Chuck, and Doug.

1. some of you obviously don't know this, but my first name is Sharon Drew - like Mary Ann. so when you call me only 'sharon', that's not my name... so in future, please remember both names. thanks.

2. thanks, all, for your kind words. but i have a huge, huge curiousity. 1. i'm giving you pieces of information about WHAT needs to be done in re helping folks making their best decisions, but it's impossible to offer the HOW on this format.

so i'm curious: 1. i don't notice any of you purchasing any of my material that would actually go further in helping you learn the stuff, rather than chat about it. the material is based on a very specific sequence of how folks make decisions (i actually have a whole company that teaches decision making and the Buying Facilitation is only one of the models that employ the Decision Facilitation model), so it's virtually impossible to 'do' without learning the sequence and learning how to formulate the questions. knowing that buyers need to decide, and leading them through their unique decision making criteria are two different things. and you can't learn it without tools.
2. that leads me to this question: i seem to notice a large number of people on the forum that have interest in Buying Facilitation. do you folks want me to put on a Public Training for the Forum? i can run a training program here in austin - once summer is over austin is wonderful - and you can all come learn the HOW.

thoughts?? -Sharon Drew Morgen

Sharon Drew,

Haven't as yet seen any of your material available for sale.

Does participation in this forum obligate us to purchase materials referenced here?

Chuck -Sales Pro 1000

Hi Chuck: of course there is no obligation. and i don't sell anything on this site. but sometimes i get frustrated when folks ask me pieces of questions that demand pages to truly answer, when i have a whole ebook that teaches the whole thing appropriately. i feel like i'm cheating folks when i can't spend the hours that a real response would take.

that is why i suggest the ebook. plus, for folks with real interest i would have guessed they might have purchased it so they can learn the material enough to begin using it.

otherwise it becomes an intellectual exercise rather than a learning format.
sd -Sharon Drew Morgen

I bought "Selling with Integrity" last year. I didn't read the whole book but I will soon. :) -Thomas

it's a lovely book (she says modestly)... actually voted one of the top 9 (why 9??) sales books of the 20th century! it's a meditation book, a new age book, an autobiography (funny), and a hard hitting business book. it's got the beginnings of Buying Facilitation in it. if you wish to learn the entire model, it's in the newer ebook (written 10 years later).

it took me 20 years of working with the model before i was able to completely code the process of the decisioning sequence plus the facilitative questioning process. ok.. so i'm slow... but i've always done it naturally and have designed my training programs around that capability. when i finally sat down to write it, that was a whole 'nother level... but, it finally is 'out' and in the ebook Buying Facilitation: the new way to sell that expands and influences decisions.

so if the time comes when you want to learn the model more completely, the ebook will do that. in the meantime, enjoy SWI. i love the story about heaven and hell and the spoons in chapter 5.

and thanks for the vote of confidence!
sd -Sharon Drew Morgen

No it doesn't. Howver, if you think that you will learn anything that you can effectively apply with understanding and skill from any forum, think again. This forum does well to point out things that can improve sellng skills.

I have read Sharon Drew Morgen' books and I highly recommend them to everyone who is serious about the sales profession. You can learn new concepts, with clarity and depth, that you will not find anywhere else. -JacquesWerth

What's missing and how did it get that way?
I sell manufactured homes as personal property which makes financing very hard to come by. Very few prospects understand this until I tell them. This is one of my selling points when securing a listing. I tell them they've got a big problem that isn't going to go away and then I tell them how the company I work for has a solution to that problem in our finance department. If the customer doesn't understand what's missing without me telling them, in my example access to financing, how will questions alone help bring about understanding unless the question was something like "did you know financing one of these was very difficult?" and because of their current beliefs many won't believe it until they research it for themselves. How do you get around that? -Thomas

How can the prospect fix it himself?
I work with people who are selling their manufactured homes by themselves. Some of these people will list with a broker but only after they've tried it for awhile and couldn't sell it themself and some will sell their homes by themself especially in parks where there is a lot of traffic. One of my selling points is identifying the consequences of not selling or not selling within their time frame with questions like "what happens if the home does not sell this season, what are you going to do?". If the prospect believes he can fix it himself, in my example where the home is in a park where there is a lot of traffic, how will facilitative questions lead the prospect to change his beliefs? -Thomas

What are the systems elements that must be attended to?
Neighbors, family and other agents sometimes talk with the prospects before I do and get behind the prospects decision to sell their home without an agent. This isn't good because some prospects would rather save face than accept my help even if it means their home might not sell. How will facilitative questions help the prospect resolve this or save face? -Thomas

Sharon Drew how often do you get the response, "I don't know" to your facilitative questions and how often do those responses become a sticking point?

Example 1: Example 2: -SpeedRacer

Good questions + examples SR.

Do you find that most buyers don't initially recognize on their own the criteria a solution will have to include before they will make a change? -Houston

hi houston:
you're right:no one recognizes the criteria for change/decision making. they happen onto it eventually. that's one of the biggest problem in the 'sales' field - the assumptions that the buyer understands their process and that the decision is based on the immediate 'need' and Identified Problem. in fact, because the buyer's system has created the Identified Problem and holds it in place daily (by continually reinventing systems to do that ... so that the people they hired to do the 'work around' continue to do their jobs, the old vendors still are there and the prospects uses them, etc.).

Buying Facilitation actually codes the way brains make decisions and uses the Facilitative Questions to lead the prospect/buyer through all of their decision making criteria that they need to get to anyway - it just takes them quite some time to discover what it is. and of course, they can't make a final decision until everything is in place and they are convinced chaos won't occur because of any decisions.

i've moved sales from a product placement model to a decision facilitation model that folks the product into the solution design.

good question. thanks... sd sn; -Sharon Drew Morgen

Before anyone can make a decision to do something different, they need to recognize that something is missing that they hadn't considered. Telling them something is missing will make them react and defend, rather than teaching them how to happily open a space for something new THAT WILL MANAGE ALL OF THE ARTERIES AND VEINS THAT KEEP THE STATUS QUO IN PLACE.

until or unless they are able to move forward WITH congruence and internal harmony for all apsects of their status quo (currently all set up to maintain their beliefs) they will do nothing.

difference between: why do you wear your hair like that? or i think if you cut your hair you'd get more jobs in the mainstream sector, and you'd look more sophisticated; and, (FQ): How would you know when it was time to reconsider your hairstyle?

The Facilitative Questions work wiht systems and brain function to help the decisions that have already been made make room for something new. information (right as it might be) doesn't help a new decision to be made unless there is an actual space made for the new idea/behavior. if you put info IN, and it's accepted, that means the buyer was seeking exactly that bit, in exactly that way. so if you put data IN, you will be successful with only a handful.

Using BF you will help many others easily learn how to open for new possibilities. sd -Sharon Drew Morgen

i'm not speaking of the data points. i'm speaking of the decisions they need to make before they can even hear or find your talking points relevant.

there are 2 aspects to a sale: the product sale and the buying decision. you are talking about the product sale and assume that if you promote, present your data well they'll know what to do with it. if that were true you'd close every sale.

buyers must decide in ways that support their own internal decision process, and you have no idea what this is like cuz you're not them.

THEY ARE THE ONES THAT NEED TO KNOW how they choose agents to work with, what's stopped them from finding the right resources, etc.

can you see the difference? truly, not to 'pitch' but you might want to buy my ebook 'Buying Facilitation: the new way to sell that influences and expands decisions.'

good luck. -Sharon Drew Morgen

you don't need to know these. the buyer must recognize all of their internal systems - the spouse issues, the historic house issues - you don't need to know any of it. but unless/until they manage these historic issues, they will do nothing. sd -Sharon Drew Morgen

Hi Sharon Drew and All,

Some years ago, in my early 20’s I thought about getting into sales. I discovered your book, Buying Facilitation and I feel in love… pretty dang hard, too. I found exactly what I was looking for... an intelligent method of selling that facilitates rather than manipulates. Since then, your model has been branded in my mind as the only way I’d like to sell. But I didn’t get into sales. I had other projects that needed my attention. Now, I’m done with all that and really want to get into sales.

My profile says I’m in marketing but I’m not. I had to put in something to make the system happy. I’m not in sales… I’m just a “nobody” who wants to be extraordinary at whatever I choose to do. Now, I want to learn your method, experientially, and not just read about it. Some time ago, I also purchased your ebook. My next step is to purchase Buying Facilitation in a Box.

But I have some problems. I have no sales experience… and I feel like I have nothing to bring to a sales position if I were to get one. So, I’d like to practice using your books and box to start teaching myself your method. Do you or anybody else on the forum have any suggestions about how I might practice to just give myself some experience?

Also, honestly, it doesn’t seem that it’s possible to REALLY learn buying facilitation on my own. It seems that people need training to do it right. I would love nothing more than to get training to learn to do this, but for a guy with a low-wage job, money is an issue. Yet, another problem to solve.

So, I have some problems. And I imagine it’s going to take time to work all this out. I just wanted to put this out there and see what Sharon Drew and/or others had to say.

Sharon Drew… I think what you’ve discovered/created is brilliant. No other sales perspective resonates with me like your model does. It is intelligent, perceptive, and makes me feel really good about pursuing a sales career. Thank you so much for birthing this perspective to the world.

~ John -johncannon

Hi John:
Thank you so much for your kind words.

Here are some hard realities about learning Buying Facilitation.
1. It's not possible to learn straight from my books. Although some people cherrypick some of the Facilitative Questions (FQs), they don't use them in proper order, or use them as part of their conventional sales approach. and there was no way I was able to teach the HOWS in my books.
2. Because the material includes new skills - systems listening, formulating the FQs, formulating the Presumptive Summaries - there is no referrant for them in your communications history. So we have to start a new skills, using old, old habits, with a clean slate that has to be developed out of a well-worn slate. Got the picture?
3. The good news is that I can easily teach Buying Facilitation when I am working alongside of someone. I actually use the Model itself to help you learn, create a new slate, re-work the habits to expand them, and actually make you the Buyer/Learner, with me the Seller/Trainer/Coach. Although I generally teach the material in small groups within corporations, I've figured out how to teach the material during phone coaching, so long as you do your homework (and i give gobs of homework between sessions).

If you want to study with me, here are the choices: 1. get a group of 18 or so people together and I'll do a public training for you (I don't put on public trainings any more unfortunately); 2. we can do 6-8 coaching sessions on the phone.

Maybe you can email me directly at sdm@austin.rr.com and we can see where we go from there. In the meantime, have a look around my site www.newsalesparadigm.com and look up the training syllabi, etc to see what we'd cover.

Together we can get you up and running. You just can't do it yourself. It's like reading a book on how Tiger Woods golfs: you need Tiger to help you learn and the book will only get you so far. Even the systems listening itself is a hard, complex, unique skill to learn and it's necessary to have it to formulate the FQs.

Talk soon. Looking forward to helping you learn. And thanks for the interest.
sd -Sharon Drew Morgen

Thank you, Sharon Drew. I've sent you an email and I'm thinking about what you've said. I appreciate your kindness.

~John -johncannon