By best selling author Tim Connor, CSP
Everyone in life wants to be successful and to be happy, at least everyone I have ever met. But these often conflicting goals can seem illusive or even impossible to achieve. Add to this that each can mean different things to everyone.
Some people want successful relationships. Others want financial freedom. Some people want challenging work or careers, others want great kids. Everyone wants the freedom of choice and the ability to control their destiny in life. Some want fame, power and influence. Other people want more leisure time, while some people want to learn and grow. These differences go on and on.
Defining what success and happiness is for you is the first step in its achievement. Many people wander through life from day to day and year to year without a clue as to what they really want or knowing what is really important in life, and then they act surprised when they don't get it. Many of these people secretly hope that life will miraculously give them what they want even though they don’t really know what it is.
Life is a neutral process. It tends to give us what we desire, work for, hope for and believe we deserve. If we lack a clear vision, unrelenting belief, and consistent focused action, we will inherit the appropriate results – that’s just the way it is.
There is an old saying, "Be careful what you ask for, you just might get it."
Success and happiness are not accidents. They are the results of purposeful pursuits of what you want and are willing to work for. Don't limit yourself with self-defeating thoughts, beliefs and actions. Dream big dreams, never give up, and don't let others talk you out of your secret longings even if it takes years to get what you want it is better to hope and dream than to give up and settle.
Success is not the accumulations of stuff, toys, memories, your bank balance, a wall full of awards, fame, power or influence. Unfortunately for many, that is how they have chosen to define success. The lure of these temporary and often empty symbols or trappings of success will not satisfy your longing over the long term.
Happiness is not what you are getting as you travel life's highway, but who you are becoming. The interesting thing is that you will never have to worry about what you get, as long as you focus on your own inner development. Success and happiness tend to find their way to those people who have shown they can handle the smaller successes in life with integrity, a grateful heart, and humility.
It’s the little things that count. It’s the simple things that matter. And, it’s the giving back and not the getting that will give you a sense of fulfillment and inner peace.
