Trust and Respect

Quote:

Originally Posted by SpeedRacer

I wonder if the challenge you describe Jacques doesn't stem from miscommunication.

You provided two different meanings for the term "respect". The first was, "to regard another person as having value equal to other human beings." This makes sense to me in the context of Seller and Buyer interaction.

The second was, "to treat another person with the same consideration and high regard as other people that you esteem." This is not the same as the first definition and doesn't make sense in the context of Seller and Buyer interaction because it needs to be qualified. It's not probable that a Buyer will have the same high regard for salesman X, whom they know nothing about, as other people they might esteem such as an authority figure.

You also wrote that you thought the meaning of "Trust" was evident. Once again without qualification there is an enormous opportunity for miscommunication. Here are a few different definitions of "Trust" from different sources:

have confidence or faith in;
reliance: certainty based on past experience;
hope: expect and wish;

And to what degree of trust are we talking?

completely
substantially or generally
somewhat or slightly
rarely or not at all

What is evident to you may not be as evident to others. That is one of the challenges to clear communication.

Either that or something else is way out of whack.

I will trust you when you reply to my question in an appropriate way that meets the question head on and doesn't convolute or mutulate it or turn it into something it is not.

I will trust you when you restate my position fully rather than taking one phrase or part of my position to advance yours totally missing or ignoring the entire context of mine- go run for office if that's your hobby horse.

I will respect you when you take either YES or NO as a definitive statement and do not try to change it into something else UNLESS we have agreed upon a game or debate or argument to be played.

I will respect you when you treat me as a person to appreciate, enjoy and perhaps do business with rather than as a person to get to do what you feel I would really want to do if I knew me personally as well as you can get me to know me in knowing what I really really really want, need, and will buy from you -- for me, of course.

MitchM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SpeedRacer

I wonder if the challenge you describe Jacques doesn't stem from miscommunication.

You provided two different meanings for the term "respect". The first was, "to regard another person as having value equal to other human beings." This makes sense to me in the context of Seller and Buyer interaction.

The second was, "to treat another person with the same consideration and high regard as other people that you esteem." This is not the same as the first definition and doesn't make sense in the context of Seller and Buyer interaction because it needs to be qualified. It's not probable that a Buyer will have the same high regard for salesman X, whom they know nothing about, as other people they might esteem such as an authority figure.

You also wrote that you thought the meaning of "Trust" was evident. Once again without qualification there is an enormous opportunity for miscommunication. Here are a few different definitions of "Trust" from different sources:

have confidence or faith in;
reliance: certainty based on past experience;
hope: expect and wish;

And to what degree of trust are we talking?

completely
substantially or generally
somewhat or slightly
rarely or not at all

What is evident to you may not be as evident to others. That is one of the challenges to clear communication.

Miscommunication? I don't understand ...

Is the above post a dissertation, an exercise in hair splitting, a lecture, or is there a point to it?

Is SpeedRacer trying to learn something or are those Rhetorical questions that are intended to prove a point. If so, what is the point?

If might work better if the communications were clear.

Quote:

Originally Posted by JacquesWerth

Miscommunication? I don't understand ...

Is the above post a dissertation, an exercise in hair splitting, a lecture, or is there a point to it?

Is SpeedRacer trying to learn something or are those Rhetorical questions that are intended to prove a point. If so, what is the point?

If might work better if the communications were clear.

The burden of communiction is on the writer and in this case that is me so I'll attempt to make the connections for you Jacques.

My reply was to your post:

Quote:

Originally Posted by JacquesWerth

The definitions that I posted above are the meanings that we assign to "Respect." I think meaning of "Trust" is evident.

The hardest thing for most salespeople to get their minds around semis to be:
The most effective relationship that you can have, whether in sales or otherwise, is one of Mutual Trust and Respect.

That is why we have been working for over fifteen years to perfect the Trust and Respect Inquiry (TRI) process. The TRI is now better than ninety percent effective. It can be completed in less than twenty minutes.

To clarify my response; it seems very possible that the challenge you described (...the hardest thing for most salespeople to get their minds around seems to be...) is a result of miscommunication. Another way of saying it's possible that if the message you're trying to send was more clear less salespeople would have a challenge getting their mind around it. I've noticed that in several forum discussions two people believe they are talking about two different things when in reality they aren't. They are just using different words to describe the same thing. For instance; objections, closing, presentations, etc.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Skip Anderson

Your "sophisticated sales processes" would have had my tire salesman hang up the phone after I told him I wanted to call around to get prices. Your "sophisticated sales processes" would have lost that salesperson a sale. I hope, for the sake of his career, that he keeps doing what he's doing because he's very good at it. The worst possible thing he could do is give up on what he's doing now to instead follow your lead and decide not to handle prospects objections.

As I've posted before, I believe in the basic premise of selling to those who want to be sold to. But the high probability fervor gets so out-of-whack in this forum that someone can't even step aside and realize that a prospect calling a tire store to get prices is a darned good "high probability" prospect.

Anything taken to excess is excessive, plain and simple. Anybody who says my tire salesman would have been better off not handling my objection (rather than doing what he did) is too excessively focused on selling his book instead of the realities of selling like the many good people in the sales industry do every day to earn a living.

Skip Anderson

You've brought up several good points Skip.

There are thousands of salespeople out there today in tire stores, furniture stores, and the list goes on who are charged with the responsibility of handling their employers incoming leads or going out and securing new business. These people want to know how to sell under those circumstances not be thrown a line about how a professional would only work with the select few, and few it is, who are in the peak of their cycle (ready, willing and able) or how a professional wouldn't find herself in those circumstances.
---
An example of this that I remember was a thread about selling ice cubes to eskimos. See post #12 and #33. Can you sell ice cubes to Eskimos?

"There are thousands of salespeople out there today in tire stores, furniture stores, and the list goes on who are charged with the responsibility of handling their employers incoming leads or going out and securing new business. These people want to know how to sell under those circumstances not be thrown a line about how a professional would only work with the select few, and few it is, who are in the peak of their cycle (ready, willing and able) or how a professional wouldn't find herself in those circumstances." -- Calvin

A decade ago I was the yearbook teacher/advisor and my classed made and had published the best ten years of yearbooks in the history of a 100 year old high school. That is a fact. Most of what I learned my students taught me - I say that with true humility and not as an artificial posture. That is also a fact. Once I mastered the basics then I know what I was doing.

Anyway, my students - I did none of it myself - sold between $8,000 - $12,000 yearly in advertising. Year after year the brightest students, the honor students, students with great intellect and command of the language who tried to use all that to sell either sold the least or frustrated themselves out of trying anymore.

AND repeatedly the average and slightly below average students - but not at the bottom of the academic scale - sold the most. I gave everyone the same scripts, they could go off campus or use our phone for soliciting.

Two years in a row the best advertising seller who sold the most ads and brought in the most money for our yearbook was a special ed student (by virtue of a slightly below average reading and speaking, comprehension ability) who outsold everyone else five - ten times.

He was the only one who just read the script as I told him to read it: May I speak to the owner or manager. My name is Andy and I'm with the yearbook staff at ______ high school. We are selling advertising space that can help you have more business especially from students and their parents. Would you like to advertise in our yearbook?

That was it. While the glib and educated, slick and pretty people smiled themselves into frustration or made just a few sales - some were just not motivated, they could have done it - simple Andy with the monotonic emotionless voice made the most sales.

I'm not saying you have to be a robot nor not be able to communicate information and answer questions, listen, etc, - Andy did have a great friendly, kind and gently spirit and personality face to face and this was a simple selling proposition - BUT you have to get real simple to be successful even in sometimes complicated selling situations, I believe. THAT can take a lot of relearning and a lot of sophistication and intelligence in introspection and depth of perception.

When someone doesn't want to buy today, Calvin, not someone ready, willing and able now, just call back in a few weeks or a month - whatever the case may be - with another offer slightly but significantly worded differently.

MitchM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MitchM

When someone doesn't want to buy today, Calvin, not someone ready, willing and able now, just call back in a few weeks or a month - whatever the case may be - with another offer slightly but significantly worded differently.

Your answer is exactly my point. Regardless of what is being the said the answer is HPS. I guess when the only tool is a hammer everything looks like a nail.

You get it, Calvin - my perspective anyway. I've got another thread going but only Skip has posted in it so far - but the point is the same. Jeff wasn't ready to commit so neither was I. I never tried to get him ready to commit. I never attempted to find out why he wouldn't commit. That was up to him. I sell - I don't become everyone's Dr. Phil - Dr. MitchM. If people here do that fine - that's their life.

So when Jeff had heard many offers each somewhat worded differently over three - four, five months - he decided he wanted a product - actually he ended up with three products.

When he said he was ready [actually he heard maybe ten or twelve offers] after he had come to me with questions three other times - I asked him if he was positive he was ready. He said he was - so we taked for thirty minutes or so.

At that time I had a customer - I just had to go over some details and mutual expectations - no objections, no building rapport, no resistance - and the deal was done. It wasn't just need. want and willingness to buy that did it - it was also trust and respect.

It took me a while to unhook myself from the other way I was selling - I resisted emotionally and actually went through a very angry, frustrated almost enraged emotional state for a few months - but when the fog lifted I had changed my way.

For me that was the best thing that could have happened.

MitchM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MitchM

You get it, Calvin - my perspective anyway. I've got another thread going but only Skip has posted in it so far - but the point is the same. Jeff wasn't ready to commit so neither was I. I never tried to get him ready to commit. I never attempted to find out why he wouldn't commit. That was up to him. I sell - I don't become everyone's Dr. Phil - Dr. MitchM. If people here do that fine - that's their life.

So when Jeff had heard many offers each somewhat worded differently over three - four, five months - he decided he wanted a product - actually he ended up with three products.

When he said he was ready [actually he heard maybe ten or twelve offers] after he had come to me with questions three other times - I asked him if he was positive he was ready. He said he was - so we taked for thirty minutes or so.

At that time I had a customer - I just had to go over some details and mutual expectations - no objections, no building rapport, no resistance - and the deal was done. It wasn't just need. want and willingness to buy that did it - it was also trust and respect.

It took me a while to unhook myself from the other way I was selling - I resisted emotionally and actually went through a very angry, frustrated almost enraged emotional state for a few months - but when the fog lifted I had changed my way.

For me that was the best thing that could have happened.

MitchM

Why wouldn't the best thing that could have happened is to have had the customer buy on the first call and be a happy customer?

Skip - you will probably take what I'm about to say as sarcastic but I mean it as fact - not as sarcasm: for being a so called professional you just don't seem to get it. Jeff didn't want it on the first call nor did I want to do anything to get him to want it. If anything is what I'd call "amateur" sales technique [notwithstanding how I use the word to describe me] it would have been the application of something to see or get or help him get it when he wouldn't commit and didn't want it.

Consequently, we have a relationship built on trust AND he has already made one referral which I DIDN'T SOLICIT.

MitchM

Trust and Respect

Sales Approach Forum