I Don't Know How! I'm Afraid! I Can't Do It!

Gripped by fear, nothing any one expert can say ever makes a difference until we speak those magical confessional words out loud to ourselves: I don't know how. I'm afraid. I can't do it.

The fear of being honest, of being looked down upon, of being laughed at and scorned by people in power - managers and bosses -and the hidden fears we grow up with all keep us from achieving the success we are capable of achieving. But admitting our fears is the first step toward the cure that we seek.

Having someone you can admit that to and get help from is one of the biggest stumbling blocks to success when too often those who need our success for their own success discourage the truth from being told. That's why so many people go to resources like this and others - they don't get it in their work places.

Regardless of where good counsel is found, it always begins in the same place - you and I crying out loud to the world and to ourselves:

I don't know how!

I'm afraid!

I can't do it!

There is always help and I'd say the perfect help for every situation and every person. There is always a solution to the problem and a way to over come and grow and improve. There is always an answer beginning with sometimes toddling steps and other times big leaps into a new life of success and accomplishment.

BUT it begins with the truth and a cry for help. It begins with honesty and self respect!

MitchM

This is good stuff. Thank you MitchM.

Mitch,

You sir are correct hence the signature.

Mitch,

What you say is especially true in my country. Sometimes, it is worse than pathetic. You hire graduates with excellent paper qualifications but quite often they are so lacking in self-confidence that your heart cries out for them.

I don't know how! I'm afraid! I can't do it! You never hear them saying those words, but you can surely see it on their faces.

One of the main reasons is the restrictive campus environment. Another is the fear of having to be heard speaking in English .., not a native tongue, but used widely in the office.

It takes some time before these shortcomings could be overcome. Fortunately, the good ones will eventually come through.

There is such strength and power and human connectedness in admitting weaknesses that if everyone understood this connection all of our relationships including sales would improve.

We're often taught or come to believe that admitting a weakness shows weakness and won't project confidence onto others. Obviously there's strength in being confident in one's skills and ability to communicate, etc. and admitting weakness (or fears) isn't always necessary. It's not a tactic to sell.

Telling a story about one's experience over coming weakness or of a weak moment in life is a powerful human connection. Asking for help and admitting fears isn't only a cause of personal growth - it strengthens others.

Mr. Cesario's signature from TH is right on the mark - spot on my Scottish friend Amanda would say.

Here's to overcoming fear by meeting it head on and embracing the cause and the solution.

MitchM

We aren't defined by our results so not being successful doesn't mean you've failed, you've only received feedback on how NOT to do whatever you're doing.

One thing I hate are people who say "i can't do that, it's not me". If knocking doors (example) isn't you, then who are you? If you knocked a door, would you still be you? My oath you would.

Opening doors and windows to the possibility of great success has a lot to do with admitting our human condition in all our weaknesses, unlocking our deceptive ways from holding ourselves down when ww communicate, and being radically honest about our motives, fears, and confusions. That takes real character work.

Likewise, looking at our human strengths and potential and admitting to what we've done that's good and valuable and makes life better for ourselves and others also opens doors and windows to the possibility of great success.

The cliche is "get real" but cliches have limited use.

Working with and coaching people - not as in motivatinal and inspirational speeches which have their place - in a way that helps them open windows and doors and uncover their core beliefs and potential can build great teams.

BUT it starts individually.

MitchM

There is no such thing as failure, Just differed success.

nobody loses all the time

i had an uncle named
Sol who was a born failure and
nearly everybody said he should have gone
into vaudeville perhaps because my Uncle Sol could
sing McCann He Was A Diver on Xmas Eve like Hell Itself which
may or may not account for the fact that my Uncle

Sol indulged in that possibly most inexcusable
of all to use a highfalootin phrase
luxuries that is or to
wit farming and be
it needlessly
added

my Uncle Sol's farm
failed because the chickens
ate the vegetables so
my Uncle Sol had a
chicken farm till the
skunks ate the chickens when

my Uncle Sol
had a skunk farm but
the skunks caught cold and
died and so
my Uncle Sol imitated the
skunks in a subtle manner

or by drowning himself in the watertank
but somebody who'd given my Uncle Sol a Victor
Victrola and records while he lived presented to
him upon the auspicious occasion of his decease a
scrumptious not to mention splendiferous funeral with
tall boys in black gloves and flowers and everything and

i remember we all cried like the Missouri
when my Uncle Sol's coffin lurched because
somebody pressed a button
(and down went
my uncle
Sol

and started a worm farm)

ee cummings

MitchM